Is your little one waking up in the middle of the night? No, no, not like that. I mean, like really waking up. Waking up and staying up. For, like… hours. If you’re the parent of a baby who’s dealing with segmented sleep, you know exactly what I’m talking about. This isn’t the middle of the night. “Go in and comfort baby for ten minutes until he gets back to sleep” wake up. This is a full-blown 3:00 a.m. dance party. It’s got a few names. Segmented sleep, bifurcated sleep, split nights, and it describes a situation where your little one sleeps for a long stretch, then wakes up happy and energetic in the middle of the night and stays that way for an hour or more. Slit Nights aren’t a new or unnatural phenomenon. Back before the widespread use of the electric light bulb, people would regularly sleep for a few hours, wake up for another hour or two, then go back to sleep. They’d use the time to read, smoke, pray, and have sex (not necessarily all at once), and then after an hour or two, they’d get back into bed and sleep until morning. (Apparently, it was also a typical time for visiting one’s neighbours. Not to hate on the old days, but if my neighbours came over unannounced at three in the morning, oooohhh, things would get biblical.) Nowadays, however, the vast majority of us go to sleep at night and, hopefully, close our eyes and sleep straight through until morning. But let me guess… your baby didn’t get the memo? Split nights are actually a pretty common issue. Baby goes down at 7:30 at night, wakes up at 3:00 in the morning, parties her ass off for an hour and a half, then goes back to sleep, apparently careless about the groggy, miserable day she’s set her parents up for. So let’s take a quick look at why this happens, and then we’ll learn how to solve the problem. Why Do Split Nights Happen? There are two major drivers when it comes to sleep. First, there’s our circadian rhythm, which is our natural tendency to fall asleep when it’s dark and wake up when it’s light. Then there’s our homeostatic sleep drive, commonly known as sleep pressure, which builds up over the time we’re awake. So ideally, over the course of the day, sleep pressure builds up, then at bedtime, when the pressure hits the sweet spot, baby puts her head down and goes to sleep. Then, as that sleep pressure begins to subside, circadian rhythm takes over, and baby stays asleep until morning. In the case of a split night, we could be looking at one of two reasons why they’re waking up. ● Baby’s not getting to bed early enough, OR… ● Baby’s going to bed too early. Now before you pitch your phone out the window at that seemingly paradoxical explanation, check this out. How to Fix Split Nights? If baby’s getting to bed too late, if too much sleep pressure has built up, the brain has this instinctive response that says, “Hey, you’re tired, but you’re not sleeping. I’m guessing that’s because there’s a carnivorous apex predator around, so we’d better get ready to make a break for it,” and then starts upping the cortisol levels. The brain means well, but it’s a little behind the times on our need for lion alerts. So this can make it tough for baby to get to sleep at bedtime since that cortisol’s got them a little bit jacked. It can also cause a full wake-up at the end of a sleep cycle, which commonly happens around 2 or 3 in the morning. Ugh. If this is the case, you’re one of the lucky ones. Treat this like any other nighttime wake-up, reassure baby that it’s still bedtime, comfort her and let her get back to sleep on her own, and consider moving bedtime up a bit over the course of a few nights. But then there’s the alternate scenario. What if baby gets to bed too early? In a situation where baby’s getting lots of quality daytime sleep and going to bed early, it’s possible that there’s not enough sleep pressure built up to keep baby sleeping until their circadian rhythm takes over and helps them sleep through the rest of the night, so up they get. And now that there isn’t as much sleep pressure, and their circadian rhythm doesn’t have the horsepower to get them to sleep on their own, suddenly they’re up and active for an hour (or three!) while that pressure builds back up. Now, I’m all about early bedtimes. Too little sleep is a much bigger problem than too much. But suppose your baby’s experiencing this kind of split-night sleep. In that case, it’s worth looking at their schedule and doing a little fine-tuning to ensure that you’re hitting the optimum sleep pressure right at the same time that baby’s going to bed for the night. I know plenty of situations can arise where you’ll want to get baby to bed a little early. For example, if she had a day of lousy naps and is clearly tired half an hour before bedtime, it’s the right move to get her to bed ahead of schedule. But try to avoid putting baby to bed early, more than one or two nights in a row. We want to prevent over-tiredness, but we also don’t want them in the crib at night for more time than they’re actually capable of sleeping. So if baby’s had a tough day and didn’t nap well, it’s fine to get her to bed a little early since that sleep pressure is likely already built up, but try to get her back onto the regular schedule starting the next morning, including her wake-up time. I know that this can all start to sound like an immaculately choreographed ballet. In some ways, it can be pretty complicated. Still, the more you understand the nuances and know where to make those minor adjustments, the better your baby will sleep. The less they’ll run into these regressions, setbacks, and interruptions. One final thing to consider if you’re getting ready to tackle this situation. This is not likely to be an overnight fix. Once baby has gotten into this habit, getting them out of it can take some time. Like any attachment or dependency, overcoming it is an incremental process, and it’s likely to meet with some pushback, so if and when things get tough, remember your goal. You’re giving your little one the skills they need to sleep soundly through the night, and that contributes to their well-being in so many different ways. So stay consistent, be patient, and before too long, you and your baby will both be enjoying full nights of deep, restful sleep. AuthorErin Neri - Certified Pediatric Sleep Consultant and Owner of To The Moon and Back Sleep Consulting since 2016. Daylight savings starts each spring season and this year is shows up on Sunday, March 12, 2023.
When it's time to “spring forward” the clocks it can be a dreaded time for parents of young children because with this, comes an adjustment that does not happen immediately. This is because children tend to be more structured in their bedtime and wake up around the same time each morning and that is why people usually can see a greater effect on children when the time changes. However, there are some things you can do to help make the transition to the new time go a little smoother. My recommendation is to leave your clock alone Saturday night. Wake up Sunday morning, have breakfast, then go around your house and change your clocks. Psychologically, it will feel much better for everyone if you wait until Sunday morning to change the time. My best advice for children to help them with the change is to split the difference with the old time and the new time. How does that work? It's time to “fall back” the clocks!!
This can be a dreaded time for parents of young children because with this, comes an adjustment that does not happen immediately. This is because children tend to be more structured in their bedtime and wake up around the same time each morning and that is why people usually can see a greater effect on children when the time changes. However there are some things you can do to help make the transition to the new time go a little smoother. My recommendation is to leave your clocks alone Saturday night. Wake up Sunday morning, have breakfast, then go around your house and change your clocks. Psychologically, it will feel much better for everyone if you wait until Sunday morning to change the time. My best advice for children to help them with the change is to split the difference with the old time and the new time. How does that work? .... As a pediatric sleep consultant, there are a few questions I’ve grown accustomed to hearing. People are understandably curious about whether or not their child is going to cry, and if so, for how long. They want to know how long it’s going to take before baby starts sleeping through the night, and when they’ll be able to do the same.
And even though they never come right out and say it in so many words, they want to know if there’s some kind of magical solution that will solve the problem instantaneously without any effort, crying, or protest. With the holidays quickly approaching, parents who have recently gotten their babies, of any age, sleeping on a schedule are often worried that their little ones' sleep will regress over the Holidays.
I can assure you that those fears could not be more real. Many families struggle with severe sleep deprivation for a very long time due to the "blessing" of having a child (or two like I was) that lacks healthy independent sleep strategies. So, finally getting your whole family into a routine that works. Finally moving from being severely sleep deprived into a family that is becoming well rested. Trust me everyone inside that little family unit wants to protect their new found sleep including the little one who is finally able to sleep. When little ones finally FEEL what it feels like to have the sleep that is needed for healthy growth and development they don't want their schedule messed with either. Between the travel, excitement, and constant attention of family and friends, holidays are the easiest way to throw all of your hard work out with the wrapping paper. But fortunately, it doesn't have to be that way! With some strategic planning and an iron will, you can keep that carefully orchestrated routine running right on schedule. There are two major impediments to maintaining your kiddos routine over the holidays. One is travel, and the other is family and friends, so I want to tackle both of those topics individually. First, we will cover the travel portion... A whole year, really? How did your wee newborn, curled up on your chest, turn into a babbling, active toddler? Somehow, those long days became a short year. Happy birthday, baby! As you move into toddlerhood from 12 to 18 months, get ready for some roller coasters when it comes to food and sleep, including new schedules and routines. The non-stop eating tends to slow down, and toddlers typically only gain a few pounds between the ages of one and two. Continue to offer a variety of healthy foods for meals and snacks, but don’t get too concerned if they’re not that hungry.
our drooly, smiley baby is learning so many new things from nine to 12 months old, and they should be getting a lot of good sleep in their schedule to balance out those long wakeful stretches and process new skills. “Generally, babies at this age are having two naps, and hopefully those naps are at least an hour, if not two hours or more,” says Erin Neri, a certified paediatric sleep consultant in Sherwood Park, Alta. “They should be able to stay awake for three to four hours between naps.” She adds that there are a small percentage of kids who start to go down to one nap around 11 to 12 months, but dropping the morning nap typically happens around 15 months.
Your baby’s nighttime sleep often starts to lengthen a bit more, up to six hours at night. You may also start to see the beginnings of a schedule that works for both of you, whether it’s a baby that wants to eat as soon as they wake up or one that needs some snuggling and playtime first. “We know that there’s a fairly wide range of ‘normal’ for newborn sleep,” says Alexis Dubief, a child sleep consultant in Vermont and author of Precious Little Sleep. “It could be anywhere between 14 and 17 hours a day. The reality is that everything in that zone is normal for that individual child.”
The newborn phase is the most intense getting-to-know-you you’ll ever experience, as you attempt to figure out what your tiny human needs for sleeping and feeding. Will they have a reliable schedule or routine? Probably not. Newborns sleep a lot. Or they don’t. Or they sleep really well during the day and are ready to play from midnight to dawn with the occasional catnap. Sometimes they feed All. The. Time. And often they switch things up, just when you think you’ve finally got an idea of what to expect.
Still, many parents find it helpful to have a rough idea of a schedule and what could be coming, week by week. Here’s what to keep in mind when it comes to sleep, wake times, feeding and diaper changes in the first four weeks. |
To The Moon and Back Sleep ConsultingProviding families the tools & support they need to get their little ones sleeping through the night and napping like champs! Everyone has more fun when they are well rested! Visit Wollino - Discount Code: TOTHEMOONANDBACK10
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