If you plan on addressing your little one’s sleep issues, I want to prepare you for something.

It’s possible that things are going to get worse before they get better.
For some babies, that might mean a night or two of more intense crying at bedtime; for some, it might mean more like four or five.

That probably doesn’t come as a big surprise. If you have a child that doesn’t sleep well, you’ve probably already established an elaborate routine to respond to your baby’s bedtime. 

It’s usually a combination of feeding, bouncing, getting them settled in your arms, popping in a pacifier, and getting them into their crib at the exact right moment.

Why? Because if you try to do it any other way, your baby will cry. And if you don’t give in, they’ll cry even louder and harder. It’s a common response to behaviour modification known as an extinction burst.

EXTINCTION BURST

An extinction burst occurs when a behaviour that has been previously reinforced suddenly stops being reinforced. In other words, when a baby is used to receiving a specific response or reward for a particular behaviour, and that response or reward is suddenly removed, the baby will increase the intensity and frequency of that behaviour in an attempt to get what they want. In this case, the rocking, shushing, or nursing to sleep that they’re accustomed to.

Extinction bursts can occur in various situations, from sleep training to weaning from breastfeeding. They can be particularly challenging for parents to navigate, as it can be difficult to tell if the baby is seeking attention or if they’re genuinely upset. 

However, it’s essential to understand that extinction bursts are a normal part of a baby’s development and are not a sign that something’s wrong.

So, how can parents cope with these bedtime extinction bursts? 
One word. Consistency.

CONSISTENCY

Suppose you have decided that a particular behaviour is no longer acceptable or that a specific reward will no longer be given. In that case, it’s crucial to stick to that decision and not give in to the baby’s increased efforts to elicit the desired response.
 
Staying consistent isn’t going to be easy, I know. The increased intensity of the baby’s crying will be stressful and occasionally overwhelming. Still, it is important to remain calm and consistent. 

Get your partner involved or call in the support team, whether it’s your parents, your in-laws, your friends, or a professional sleep consultant so that you can take a break when things get to be too much for you.

As tough as things get, don’t forget this crucial fact. Extinction bursts are temporary. Good sleep habits are not. 

Once you’ve come out the other side of this experience, you can look forward to years of your little one sleeping soundly through the night. 

Need help to stay consistent and get through your child's extinction burst?
​Book your Free 20-minute Sleep Evaluation Call with me and I can explain how I can help make this transition to independent sleep a lot smoother. 

If you plan on having kids, you should pencil in a few accessories into the budget. A crib, a stroller, and a high chair are all mandatory when bringing home a new baby.


And, of course, you’re going to need a baby monitor. I honestly don’t think I’ve worked with a family without a pretty sophisticated baby monitor set up in the nursery. These days, they fall right alongside those other items as “essential” baby equipment.


And hey, not for no good reason, right? Baby monitors, even the most basic ones, provide some much-needed peace of mind for parents when they’re not in the room with their little ones. 


Unfortunately, they’re a bit of a double-edged sword because, for all the peace of mind they can provide and have the exact opposite effect. I often see parents running into their baby’s room the moment they hear the slightest peep out of the monitor. 


They check to make sure baby’s in a comfortable position, they check their temperature to make sure they’re not too hot or too cold, they check their diaper to see if they might need a change, and after they’ve confirmed that everything’s as it should be, they head back out of the room, sit down for a few minutes until they hear another rustle come through the speaker, and then they’re back in action, repeating the whole process.


Seriously. I’ve seen it happen with more than a few families. And I assure you, I’m not exaggerating even a little bit!


Now, if you’re reading this and thinking, “What’s so strange about that?” then it’s possible that you are, in fact, addicted to your baby monitor.


Interesting little side note here, did you know that the first baby monitor was invented back in 1937 as a result of the infamous Lindbergh baby kidnapping? 
​It’s true! Eugene MacDonald, then president of Zenith (a familiar name in electronics for all of us old-timers), heard about the incident and commissioned designer Isamu Noguchi to create a radio device to transmit sound from the baby’s room to a receiver elsewhere in the house. Good luck snatching a baby out of their crib now, you stupid kidnappers.


Over the years, monitors have become increasingly sophisticated. First, they switched from radio to digital signals, did away with the wires, and added two-way communication so parents could speak to their babies as well as hear them; then came the video monitors, wi-fi capability for better picture and sound, and now, now they can monitor a baby’s heart rate, oxygen levels, movements, breathing, sleeping position, even whether or not baby’s got a wet diaper.


And therein lies the problem.


On the one hand, I think it’s great that we have the technology to monitor our baby’s vital signs and make sure they’re not in a dangerous sleeping position. 


On the other hand, it’s not exactly good for your mental wellness or your baby’s sleep if you’re in a state of hyper-vigilance throughout the night and rushing in to “fix” things every time baby fusses a little, or the temperature in the nursery rises by a half a degree.


Now, I know the absolutely gut-wrenching anxiety that parents have about keeping their little ones safe. There’s absolutely no instinct in the world more powerful than the desire to protect your kids. Still, there’s a big difference between exercising due care and obsessing over unnecessary details. 

Bear in mind that baby monitors have not proven to be effective in reducing the incidence of SIDS.

Bear in mind that baby monitors have not proven to be effective in reducing the incidence of SIDS, so even with the millions, probably billions of these machines in nurseries around the world, they haven’t really done anything to prevent the one major catastrophe that parents are desperately trying to avoid.


Again, I don’t want to discourage the use of a monitor. But if you’re going to use one, remember what they were designed for. They’re for peace of mind and to inform you of a potential emergency, not to act as a call button demanding immediate attention every time you hear your baby stirring at night. 


Allowing them to fall back to sleep when they wake up in the night is important and actually essential if you want them to learn the skills they need to enjoy nights of restful, rejuvenating sleep regularly.


If you want to minimize the potential for SIDS, injuries, or other nighttime mishaps, check out the American Academy of Pediatrics guide to safe sleep. You’ll find some incredibly valuable information there. 


Most notably, put your baby on their back to sleep, keep the crib clear of any possible airway obstructions, don’t smoke, breastfeed if possible, and use a firm mattress and a tightly secured fitted sheet. That will go a lot further toward keeping your baby safe than even the most technologically advanced baby monitor ever could.


In short, if your baby monitor gives you peace of mind, keep using it. However, it’s time to make a change if it’s stressing you out. 

Ready to make a change for your family?
I can help you teach your baby or toddler independent sleep skills so they have control over their own sleep so they are sleeping peacefully through the night and napping like a champ. All while supporting you, mom, to gain peace of mind around baby's ability to sleep well and letting go of the baby monitor addiction. 

Book Your Free 20-minute Sleep Evaluation Call now and lets chat about what's going on in your family and how I can help. 

Happy 2023, everybody! It’s a whole new year full of potential and opportunities!

If you’re like me, when the calendar flips over, you set some lofty new goals to improve your quality of life. 

Get more exercise, eat healthier, land a new job, save some money, and spend more time with family; there’s no shortage of resolutions we can make to make ourselves and our families happier and healthier. Creating a “New Year’s resolution” has been around for hundreds of years.

Sadly, around 88% of people seem to fall short of their resolution goals, but I have a great strategy to help you join the happy minority who set their intentions on January 1st and succeed.

How? Well, you probably won’t be too surprised to hear that it involves sleep. (Surprise!) But don’t get the wrong idea! I’m looking at four of the most common, non-sleep-related new year’s resolutions and explaining how a good night’s sleep can scientifically maximize your chances of achieving each of them.

So check it out! Here they are, along with the percentage of people who swear they’re going to achieve it on an average New Year’s Eve.


Lose Weight - 40%
If you’re not getting the recommended 7 hours of sleep per night, it might be affecting your ability to lose weight. 

That may seem a little counterintuitive to some people. After all, the more time we spend awake and active, the more calories we burn, right?
The problem is that sleep plays a crucial role in moderating two vital hormones called ghrelin and leptin. Ghrelin sends hunger signals to your brain, and leptin does the opposite, signalling fullness and suppressing hunger. 

A 2004 study found that ghrelin levels were almost 15% higher in people who didn’t get enough sleep, and leptin levels were 15.5% lower, causing them to feel hungry more often. So if you’re determined to lose weight this year, getting enough sleep can go a long way to helping you reach that goal.


Get more exercise - 52%
Getting in shape is always an admirable goal. Getting your heart rate up, staying active, improving flexibility, and building strength are all excellent ways to help you stay healthy and feel your best.

But if you’re not getting the sleep you need, getting motivated to hit the gym or go for a run can be a much more significant challenge than it needs to be. You’re likely to get tired out faster and not see the results as quickly as you would if you’re regularly enjoying a good night’s sleep.
​
Sleep is the body’s regeneration phase, so even if you work out vigorously during the day, your muscles won’t regenerate bigger and stronger if you don’t get the recommended amount of sleep at night. Or, as the gym fanatics would put it, “You ain’t gonna see those gains, bro!”

In short, getting the biggest return on the effort you put into your workout requires a good night’s sleep. Seeing those results is an excellent way to stay motivated. 


Spend more time with family - 37%
We’re all looking to make the most of our time, but we also obviously have responsibilities that must be attended to. Whether you’re working a 9-5 job, running a small business, or a stay-at-home mom, by the time you’ve tackled everything that needs to be done in a day, there’s hardly any time to just get together as a family and enjoy each other’s company. 

We can’t increase the number of hours in a day, but we can increase our productivity, freeing up time to do the things we love, and to do so, all you need to do is get to bed on time.
According to Dr. Michael Grandner, director of the Sleep and Health Research Program, “Many people believe that in order to get more done, they need to sacrifice sleep.” However, this study shows that, quite to the contrary, poor sleep is associated with lower productivity in general, and specifically across a wide range of areas.”

So, simply put, even though you may be getting to bed earlier, that extra sleep will increase your productivity to the point where you’ll actually have more time during the day to spend doing the things you love.


Eat Healthier - 50%
Check this out. A 2013 study found that sleep deprivation led to significantly higher cravings for foods high in fat and/or sugar. 

You can check out the article for all the science-y stuff, but I’ll let the study’s authors explain it in layperson’s terms.

“What we have discovered is that high-level brain regions required for complex judgments and decisions become blunted by a lack of sleep, while more primal brain structures that control motivation and desire are amplified.

These results shed light on how the brain becomes impaired by sleep deprivation, leading to the selection of more unhealthy foods and, ultimately, higher rates of obesity.”

So, getting enough sleep can actually make it easier for you to eat right. How great is that!?

And there you have it, people. If you want to set yourself up for some new year’s resolution success, there’s one habit you can focus on that’ll make all the others much easier to achieve. Get to bed on time, turn off those screens at least an hour before you hit the hay, leave your phone in the living room, and take the time to wind down before bed. 

And if you’re not sleeping well because your little one is waking up at night, we should talk! Solving your baby’s sleep issues is the first step to solving your own, and I’ve helped hundreds of families do exactly that. 
​
Book your Free 20 Minute Sleep Evaluation now. 
​

So you’re on the fence about this whole, “Teaching your baby to sleep,” thing.

On the one hand, you know that sleep is essential for everyone in your family. You’ve read all the literature and have come to agree with the consensus of the pediatric community that sleep is vital to your baby’s development and well-being.

You’re 100 percent positive that your little one needs some help learning how to sleep well, and you’re dedicated to helping them overcome this obstacle.
And on the other hand, you’re nervous as hell about it.

​Almost every parent I’ve worked with has started off absolutely riddled with anxiety. They know there’s a problem that needs fixing and they’re committed to that solution, but even with all of the research and evidence that this is a safe, effective process, they’re still on pins and needles.

Let me just throw a little disclaimer out in front of this post by saying that I’m neither a doctor nor a professional research scientist. I’m a sleep specialist with a fascination for all things sleep-related, and I follow the latest research and studies in the field.

Typically when I write these posts, I like to rely on peer-reviewed studies that have been evaluated, replicated, and borne out conclusive evidence to support them, but today I’m focusing on something that’s a little on the speculative side, since it’s a relatively new theory, and it’s a super interesting one for anyone with a seemingly “restless” baby.

Now, when a parent tells me they have a restless baby, I have a series of questions I tend to ask in order to determine whether it’s due to a “sleep prop.” That’s industry terminology for something that Baby’s grown dependent on in order to get to sleep. Breastfeeding to sleep, rocking to sleep, sucking on a pacifier, stroller rides, are all examples of these “sleep props.”

And most of the time I find that, yes, that’s absolutely the problem, and we address it and things get significantly better in a few nights.

As a pediatric sleep consultant, there are a few questions I’ve grown accustomed to hearing. People are understandably curious about whether or not their child is going to cry, and if so, for how long. They want to know how long it’s going to take before baby starts sleeping through the night, and when they’ll be able to do the same.

And even though they never come right out and say it in so many words, they want to know if there’s some kind of magical solution that will solve the problem instantaneously without any effort, crying, or protest.